Admit something anything

U

URBANUS

Guest
I never ever look in the photography thread on this forum.
Please people, admit something anything.
 
In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max’s toupee and I glued it on my face when I played Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog. When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out. But the worst thing I ever done, I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaah and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.
 
I am planning my suicide and this time it will be third time lucky. For those that have never been there who think it is just go ahead and do it I can honestly say there is a lot of planning that comes along with it. Most of all you fight your mind and guilt and all that crap but you need to focus on the horizon and what is beyond it and the jubilation of letting go of the hell that is life.
 
g23 said:
I'm a big fan of frosted shredded wheat, but I'm not above getting into my kid's Cap'n Crunch. Never for breakfast though. Mainly for dessert/late night snack.
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If only I could find some milk in the grocery store. Seems impossible these days.
 
Harsh Truth said:
If only I could find some milk in the grocery store. Seems impossible these days.
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It's in the back, past the nut milk and soy everything. Go through the door that says employees only, you will find a room of black onyx with an imposing Sphinx who will ask you three riddles. If you can answer them and sit through the following PETA lecture given by what appears to be an aged wizard, the milk shall be yours.
 
g23 said:
It's in the back, past the nut milk and soy everything. Go through the door that says employees only, you will find a room of black onyx with an imposing Sphinx who will ask you three riddles. If you can answer them and sit through the following PETA lecture given by what appears to be an aged wizard, the milk shall be yours.
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Don't be silly, that's Morrissey.
 
g23 said:
"A wizard is neither early nor late, he arrives precisely when he means to, except for sometimes when the stage heater isn't working or any other number of excuses, really."
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That's some mystic stuff you've got there. And it explains a lot.
 
URBANUS said:
I hate fellow swedes, glad you're across the pond you offspring from traitors that left cause they couldn't handle a little starving.
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There’s the Urbanus I missed so much. No one can come close to imitating that special mix of piss and vinegar. Glad you survived the famine.
 
URBANUS said:
I am planning my suicide and this time it will be third time lucky. For those that have never been there who think it is just go ahead and do it I can honestly say there is a lot of planning that comes along with it. Most of all you fight your mind and guilt and all that crap but you need to focus on the horizon and what is beyond it and the jubilation of letting go of the hell that is life.
Click to expand...
Yada yada yada......
 
OK, this I’ve only owned up to once before and only once I was safely an adult. When I was 5 and my brother was 2, and we happened upon my mother’s sewing machine on but unattended so I stuck his thumb under the needle and turned it on. I can still recall two noises clearly: 1) the strained sound of the motor trying to pull the needle back out of his thumbnail unsuccessfully and 2) his howls of intense pain. Now I think this was mainly about curiousity and that I didn’t intend to hurt him. But I did have the presence of mind to experiment on his thumb and not on my own. I also felt that it was immediately time to high-tail it out of there and get to another floor. My brother was discovered there and due to his poor verbal skills, it was assumed he was a dumbass who did it to his own fool self. I got away completely. It was sometime in my 20s when I brought this up and turned myself in as the budding psychopath I was back then.
 
Try Anything Twice said:
OK, this I’ve only owned up to once before and only once I was safely an adult. When I was 5 and my brother was 2, and we happened upon my mother’s sewing machine on but unattended so I stuck his thumb under the needle and turned it on. I can still recall two noises clearly: 1) the strained sound of the motor trying to pull the needle back out of his thumbnail unsuccessfully and 2) his howls of intense pain. Now I think this was mainly about curiousity and that I didn’t intend to hurt him. But I did have the presence of mind to experiment on his thumb and not on my own. I also felt that it was immediately time to high-tail it out of there and get to another floor. My brother was discovered there and due to his poor verbal skills, it was assumed he was a dumbass who did it to his own fool self. I got away completely. It was sometime in my 20s when I brought this up and turned myself in as the budding psychopath I was back then.
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So I take it your listed location of "A Safety Haven" is actually a nice way of saying the psychiatric ward?! ;)
 
Try Anything Twice said:
OK, this I’ve only owned up to once before and only once I was safely an adult. When I was 5 and my brother was 2, and we happened upon my mother’s sewing machine on but unattended so I stuck his thumb under the needle and turned it on. I can still recall two noises clearly: 1) the strained sound of the motor trying to pull the needle back out of his thumbnail unsuccessfully and 2) his howls of intense pain. Now I think this was mainly about curiousity and that I didn’t intend to hurt him. But I did have the presence of mind to experiment on his thumb and not on my own. I also felt that it was immediately time to high-tail it out of there and get to another floor. My brother was discovered there and due to his poor verbal skills, it was assumed he was a dumbass who did it to his own fool self. I got away completely. It was sometime in my 20s when I brought this up and turned myself in as the budding psychopath I was back then.
Click to expand...
I was just a criminal mastermind. One of my earliest memories is one of the neighbors getting a beautiful red tricycle for his birthday, and me, being a covetous little bastard, stole it from his yard when they were inside. I knew that I couldn't get away with it as it was, so I hid in the shed, where I found a bucket of bright yellow paint (Think curb paint) and brush painted the whole thing- and I mean the whole thing, tires, handlebars, spokes and all. No one could possibly ever think I stole it, it was a bright red tricycle, and here I was, the proud owner of a bright yellow tricycle, (and bright yellow hands, and butt) so I was really surprised when the grown ups figured me out in an instant. My parents had to buy him a brand new one, and I was made to pick strawberries to earn money to pay my parents, and was given the awful looking yellow tricycle at the end of the summer when I'd paid it off.
 
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