Putting things together though, it kinda makes sense. I mean what if she were his girlfriend? So they do a trial "girlfriend/boyfriend" pose to test it out and see what people think. He says in the Guardian article that relationships are messy, blah, blah, blah. He's lying to protect the relationship he's in because the photo was met with YOU'VE BETRAYED US, YOUR FANS! BLAH!!! So now, he and his tiny lover with the nice bewbs meet in private in his cottage and get it on everyday. It makes sense from my perspective.
I had to google kickshaw. I think I found a pic of her since you mention she's a lady of ladders.
It was just an innocent Joyce quotation the point is that the sentence after that one says nothing but 'Talk that to someone else, Stevie'.
And if she is indeed a lady of ladders and indeed Spanishy, I suppose her name should be Ascension Garcia