posted by davidt on Wednesday December 10 2003, @10:00AM
Brier writes:

From this week's issue of The Onion:

"When The Smiths broke up in 1987, everyone knew that Morrissey would be exposed as a no-talent, and that the full genius of guitarist/songwriter Johnny Marr would be revealed at last. Impressive session work for The Pretenders, Talking Heads, The The, and others fanned the flames. Then the should-have-been-brilliant-but-wasn't Bernard Sumner collaboration happened. Then everyone forgot about Johnny Marr. Then, earlier this year, Marr and his band The Healers released an album that sounded like the lost work of some uninspired early-'90s Stone Roses wannabe. Then everyone forgot about Johnny Marr again."

See The Onion's entire list of "Least Essential Albums of 2003" here.
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  • Never know - could this be another spur for him to collaborate with Mozzer (and vice versa)?

    PS - first post. Been looking to achieve this for last 3 years.
    kimbo -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @11:34AM (#81694)
    (User #8993 Info)
    • Re:Could not. by kimbo (Score:1) Friday December 12 2003, @10:36AM
    • 1 reply beneath your current threshold.
  • In my opinion, the LEAST essential solo album from 2003 would have to be Martin Gore's 'Counterfeit'. Talk about pure shit! That album left me with nothing other than an urge to choke the last bits of life out of Martin! Shame on him for taking my $15.00!!

    2nd least essential = David Gahan's 'Whatever that piece of crap was called' cd. Gak!
    Anonymous -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @11:45AM (#81697)
    • Re:solo albums by Anonymous (Score:0) Wednesday December 10 2003, @12:01PM
    • Re:solo albums by MOZ IS GOD (Score:1) Wednesday December 10 2003, @06:04PM
      • Re:solo albums by Anonymous (Score:0) Wednesday December 10 2003, @07:37PM
      • Re:solo albums by Martin (Score:1) Friday December 12 2003, @03:38AM
      • Re:solo albums by glam72 (Score:1) Monday December 15 2003, @01:17AM
    • Re:solo albums by Anonymous (Score:0) Thursday December 11 2003, @08:33AM
  • Fair enough, Boomslang wasn’t a great album, but it is still far better than most of the dross currently available (including 2003’s “5 star” indie albums Cast of Thousands, Silence is Easy etc). It’s easy to develop NME syndrome, and kick anything with some musical and historical precedent, but Last Ride and Down on the Corner are certainly quality tunes, it just seems people don’t want to listen.

    Anyway, getting to the real point, what is all this “should-have-been-brilliant-but-wasn't Bernard Sumner collaboration” nonsense. Electronic were a great band. The first album was a glacial indie-disco-pop classic, while the second and third certainly had their moments. How quickly people forget.
    Still Seasick -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @12:03PM (#81704)
    (User #9501 Info)
  • "When The Smiths broke up in 1987, everyone knew that Morrissey would be exposed as a no-talent, and that the full genius of guitarist/songwriter Johnny Marr would be revealed at last."

    ahahahaha, this guys is a joke...
    Anonymous -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @12:40PM (#81709)
    • Re:ahahahaha by hanz_ofbyotch (Score:1) Thursday December 11 2003, @07:22AM
  • Interesting that all these "least essential" albums of 2003 have "Buy" links.

    Conceivably, then, Onion could earn referrer revenues for albums they completely trashed.

    ;p
    alainsane -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @01:12PM (#81710)
    (User #460 Info)
  • A Bit Harsh... (Score:2, Informative)

    Nah I don't agree at all... Boomslang has a few outstanding tracks (Last Ride, Down on the Corner, Caught Up, etc. )that blow away most of the crap that was forced upon the public this past year... remember: The Onion is a joke.
    Mud <[email protected]> -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @01:49PM (#81712)
    (User #454 Info | http://jaytando.tripod.com/meeting-morrissey/)
    I'm really just Some Totally Random Moz Fan
  • The Onion is great. I recommend reading it to everyone.
    Mannix -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @02:21PM (#81716)
    (User #1379 Info)
  • I wanted to like it, I really did. I must have played it 10 times in a row hoping it would grow on me. No Deal. Can't take anything away from his playing, but that voice, not a lovely singing voice at all.
    Anonymous -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @03:26PM (#81722)
  • Boomslang is really bad and probably Johnny can't make any good music anymore. Sad!!I lost my faith!
    Anonymous -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @06:58PM (#81744)
    • Re:Boomslang by Anonymous (Score:0) Friday December 12 2003, @08:44PM
  • Alas, poor Johnny Marr. At least he still thinks he's cool.
    Davy_Havok -- Thursday December 11 2003, @12:33AM (#81760)
    (User #3893 Info | http://blogawayla.com/)
  • I always knew onions smelt bad. Johnny Rules!
    DannyDangerous -- Thursday December 11 2003, @01:23AM (#81762)
    (User #1158 Info)
    "It takes strength to be gentle & kind"
  • Boomslag is by all standards a good album. Too bad it's not really very original. It has the feel of Telling Stories by The Charlatans, it sounds like Kula Shaker "Peasant Pigs & ..." and one could go on ... forever.
    But compared to the rest of that lot, it's technically much better brought together.
    Anonymous -- Thursday December 11 2003, @09:15AM (#81789)
  • It's all i have to say.

    Sheridan Whitehead
    Anonymous -- Thursday December 11 2003, @11:11AM (#81797)
  • My wife and I listen to Marr's album all the time and love it.
    Davey Boy -- Saturday December 13 2003, @05:27PM (#81985)
    (User #508 Info)
    • Re:I love it! by Anonymous (Score:0) Monday December 15 2003, @05:08PM
      • Re:I love it! by droylsdener (Score:1) Sunday December 21 2003, @05:45PM
  • Well, music appreciation is really a subjective experience- everybody listens to it with different ears and hearts. I love this album. I got an advance copy on Halloween (*somebody's* birthday). Over a year later, and it's still part of the soundtrack of my life. (This is a great album to drive to.)

    Johnny has made choices that many here disagree with, but if you get a chance to catch his live show, or even just to read some of his interviews- he's exuding happiness and seems really centered. Irrelevant? This music is a new expression from the same man who wrote songs some of you have worn out from playing so much. He has grown up and has different priorities- he's coming from a different place than he was back then. After all these years, if he was writing Smiths-y songs, it would just be sort of pathetic.

    I'm happy for him and wish him well.

    http://www.thebluegirl.com/gallery/Johnny-Marr-and-The-Healers,-US-Tour-2003
    BlueGirl -- Tuesday December 16 2003, @06:20AM (#82143)
    (User #63 Info | http://www.thebluegirl.com/)
    "We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are."- Anais Nin
  • this is the last message i will ever post.....*cheers*!

    no, i've not changed my mind again....(whoops)
    love, peace and harmony hairspray.

    KES x
    Anonymous -- Wednesday December 17 2003, @11:30AM (#82242)
  • Boomslang is one of the shittest albums ever. I'm so lucky that I didn't buy it!!! CRAP!!!
    Anonymous -- Wednesday December 17 2003, @07:27PM (#82276)
  • You haven't even heard it you negative tosser.
    (Or PR Man for Andy...)
    Anonymous -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @04:05PM (#81728)
  • Asshole. Get off this site.
    Anonymous -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @04:07PM (#81729)
  • dont attack Johnny Marr on a personal level, he is one of the nicest and most sincere people i have ever met, celebrity or not. AS he said to me, he would be doing this for his friends, even if he had never made it, the guy loves music, you gotta respect that!
    Anonymous -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @05:34PM (#81733)
  • Andy was an incredible talent and an extremely solid bassist. WHat a great fit for the Smiths he was. Unfortunately I agree addiction has gotten the best of him but he may salvage it. He has some tunes on his new web site that are very listenable and hold promise. He is also still relatively on the good side of the Mozzer which is a feat considering the court case.
    I think Moz has a perfect band now though.
    Now Joyce is another animal entirely ...don't get me started on that subject.
    MOZ IS GOD -- Wednesday December 10 2003, @06:09PM (#81736)
    (User #3249 Info | http://www.myspace.com/coldwarspies)
  • It's actually going to be a brilliant album.

    The alternative title that they decided not to go with was:

    Irish Stud, English Tart
    Belligerent Ghoul -- Thursday December 11 2003, @12:33AM (#81759)
    (User #9224 Info)
    There is a light that never goes out...
  • Thats complete and utterly bollocks. Frankly.
    Anonymous -- Thursday December 11 2003, @07:19AM (#81780)
  • marr is a perfectly good singer and has a perfectly nice voice, i imagine it comes down to taste---we all know morrissey can only sing in tune on record and he sometimes sounds like a goat, but hey, i still love it. it's the same with a lot of great frontmen--marc bolan, liam gallagher, ian brown...none of them actually are good singers. if you want proper singers then go listen to shit like Celine Dion who will always be in tune and hit the right notes--but it's still shit. And how can you say Marr is a pussy and cant take pressure, when Morrissey cant even get a record contract because of how badly he handles pressure--and i dont want to call moz a pussy 'cos i love him, but c'mon....lots of people would say the same thing about him for lots of reasons. the fact is marr and moz are both wonderfully talented and they DONT need to be together to be great. i cant believe people here still wish for a Smiths reunion--you hate Marr but you want him back, what the hell is that about? they have lives of their own and have careers of their own. moz hid away for just as long as Marr did, and nobody was even interested in signing him-- at least johnny had lots of bands begging for him to join. and did it ever occur to anyone that maybe he didnt start or join a band for all these years because he didnt damn well feel like it? I hope one day you get your wish and Marr & Moz get together again, then they can sound like Oasis (seeing as theyre both big fans)and you'll hate them both together. if you want to live in the past, do it, but youve gotta realize that moz & marr arent going to do the same just to please you.
    Anonymous -- Thursday December 11 2003, @10:00PM (#81841)
  • 2 replies beneath your current threshold.


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